OMG… It has been quite a minute since I last updated this blog ….. loll… I guess all my blogging excitement died after my initial blog…… or rather should I say I have been caught up in what I refer to as the ups and downs of life’s struggle…*with eye brows raised.. Saying …yeah right*… Actually to be honest ……*with hand over eyes* ….I have been overwhelmed with extreme laziness…plus some unnecessary emotional stress….heheh… O well …I am now back on it like “beans on toast” or as a very lovely friend would say “I am on it like a car bonnet” … heheh…
I am one who is deeply and madly in love with the God, photography, music, food and fashion. However, lately I have been cheating *covering face in shame* on all my lovers; and to make matters worse, it has been with some one/ *thing* definitely not worth the sacrifice, time and effort. The irony of it all is that… at first it felt sooo good…. you feel a high rush of misguided excitement and extreme ecstasy topped up with an overdose of intense pleasure, and then when it all comes crashing down… excitement becomes emptiness, ecstasy becomes anxiety and pleasure becomes excruciating pain leading to lasting regrets for my initial foolish action to cheat.
Gratefully, due to my ignorance, I have come to realise in order for this episode to never air again, I always have to “begin with the end in Mind”, taking the initiative to recognise that I am responsible for my actions and my reaction to my distractions.
Let me give you a brief preview into my REDEFINED thought process. I begin with an image, picture or paradigm of the end of my life as my frame of reference, or as the criterion by which everything else should be examined. By keeping that end clearly in mind I can make certain that whatever I do on any particular day does not violate the criteria I have defined as supremely important, and that each day of my life contributes in a meaningful way to the vision of my life as a whole… *whew* deep right.. hehehhe…
In my opinion to “begin with the end in MIND” is to start with a clear understanding of your destination, enabling you to know where you‘re going so that you better understand where you are now and so that the steps you take are always in the right direction. Thus, you need to know that YOU and only YOU is responsible …. *shouting at the top of my voice* “response-able”, for knowing how to use your imagination and creativity with correct principles as the fundamental route to “begin with the end in MIND”.
In my view taking responsibility doesn’t not mean being pushy, obnoxious or aggressive. It means recognising it is your responsibility to make things happen. We are responsible for our own effectiveness, for our own happiness and ultimately for most of the circumstances we find ourselves in.
What ever is at the centre of your life will be the source of your security, guidance, wisdom and power.; and because I have allowed negative things to be the centre of my life(not anymore), I have allowed insecurity lead to unclear guidance thus hindering wisdom to release direct power. Therefore on MY road to recovery I have identifyed these mistakes and by using the experienced gained to move ahead I have a better perspective of my life and a sense of what direction to take.
Ok now… wait a sec…. me sharing my experiences is not to seek attention or anything of that sort *shaking head* ….. *Nah….don’t even go there* …… however I choose to use it as a medium to help encourage people who feel lost, depressed or empty… or maybe to entertain any one who may just be bored and fancy reading me rant about some *serious gobbledygook*… heheh……….
On a more serious note, I have been able come out of a state of * self aided insanity* with the help of MY FAMILY_ (family is so precious), MY FRIENDS (you know who you are… Big KISSSS xxx) and my father, the love of my life, my creator, my redeemer and my life … PAPA G.O.D…
More serious rant to come… Please stay tuned XXXxxxxx